mashy’s blog

i’m back!! i know, i’ve missed posting blog for two months… a little catching up to do. i spent summer in a different way. while everybody here is wearing light and thin stuff, i was enduring the cold because it’s spring in a place i stayed so i have to wear thick and heavy stuff in some places.

now, summer is over and i welcome rainy season with delight! really, i like the rain more than the sun. rain has a refreshing effect after a drought. it’s like spring where buds grow and flowers bloom beautifully. rain washes and cleans up the surroundings to make new beginnings.remember how God brought flood to noah’s time to wash out sinful nature of human beings… so what is it in me?….

i was finishing dinner and the rain still continue to pour outside. i got the idea of welcoming the rain by making a hot coffee, get some oatmeal cookies, grab my celfone to turn on the music player, and pull a chair in the front porch of my home. i watched the rain drop from trees, on the road and on my roof while sipping coffee and listening to relaxing bossa music. i hummed to the music as the rain gives the beat  to my out-of-tune voice. actually, the rain drops are just enough to play music in my ear but you know me.. i accentuate… always….

while doing the act of being sentimental at the moment, i reflected on my inner self. yes, the rain got me to realize of all the things i made in the past that i have to wash out and start anew. it’s like a new year’s resolution but instead of fireworks, i was confronted by the rain. bitter things happened and i want to start all over again.i want to start as a person who can stand in the rain, be prepared for the storm and make new beginnings.

and after that, i switched the music to something loud to signify my motivation. i lip sync cueshe’s song "ülan" with matching hands swaying like hitting the drums and head banging as the bass strikes loudly. i just hope the neighborhood is not watching coz they might think i’m crazy hehe.

idiomatically speaking, rain can be a warning or start of a storm. it comes and it’s inevitable. in real life, when we see the rain coming, expect also the storm. for the storm is a test on how we can withstand being uprooted….   

it’s been my practice to post blog every month. something to talk  about a significant event of the month, that’s always in my train of thoughts. and this march, i think i’m running out of the things i should celebrate. it’s fire prevention month, ya sure but nothing is like so striking huh. what about graduation?… duh! so over it. ummm, ok women’s month would be an intelligent choice… but  whenever i think of that, i think of woman’s health, breast exam, pap smear etc. and of course the stereotype"essence of being a woman" kind of thing. everybody knows that already. everybody knows the importance of a woman be it in a home or work field, or politics.
so what am i gonna write to make my metacarpals click this time?
maybe i should write something about friendship. ahh interesting! there’s a lot of phrases made about it, maybe because of the complexity of its existence to human  bond. matter of fact, when i heard the lines said about friendship in desperate housewives (the conversation about friendship with bree and gabrielle),"it strikes me so deep that i created my own version of it. i even posted it to my shoutout a couple of months ago. i quoted, "good friends tell each other’s stories, great friends share their deep and innermost thoughts". it’s really true you know. when some friends ask how have you been doing, you will reply by saying "i’m fine" or anything that is fine. ok fine! but when our great friends ask the same, we would elaborate on how we become fine, or if we really are fine. we share our true feelings because there’s trust and confidentiality in this person, you know that whatever you say, he will not use it against you. as for me, i have lots of good friends but i have few great friends. and they are my treasures. it’s really easy to make friends but to keep them makes a lot of effort (but you know it’s worth it). that’s why my list of friends here in friendster are not that much because i wanna make sure i can keep track of all of them. if there’s an event going on in their lives that they’d like to share, i keep it. and when i look at those pics, i always wish for them more blessings because i am really happy to know that my friends are doing well.
once, i have a friend jokingly said that it’s an honor for me to have him as my friend and so i laughed and said that it’s actually the other way around. i can offer great friendship and sincerity more than he can give me. oh well, he’ll realize it when the need arises haha! but in fairness, it’s just a joke when we said that to each other because we are actually great friends and we know it already. he’s not in my friendster coz he doesn’t have one (his reason - too old daw for this kind of things hehe). ok, i respect that thought.
and guess what….before the end of this month, i will see my great friends abroad and so excited about it. that’s really something. friends can stand the test of time, right? and i’ll know that when i see them. i am so excited,can’t wait actually.
ok try this, "friends may come and go,but their memories stay".

way back in my senior high, this guy is always exchanging seats with my seat mate. well, i thought he just can’t see what’s on the board but wait, he’s sitting two rows in front of me… how come he can’t see the writings on the board? what the heck, maybe he just wants me to help him with our english subject. so that was it, he would borrow my notes and return it with another note also inside the pages saying sweet nothings (i can’t exactly remember those words duh, i’d threw it). hey, i’ve been eyeing somebody else at that time so i’m not interested. besides, everytime i hear his surname, i’ll tell myself that i would not marry a person with that  funny surname.

but then, months of sitting beside each other has developed friendship. my friends are his friends and his’ mine, too until we
all are one big circle of friends. but this friendship has come to an end when i said yes to him, actually i don’t really mean it at that time because it was graduation and we all have to go our separate ways. frankly, i don’t want us to go our separate ways as friends. but it has to be more than that to keep him along.

went to college and i  would go abroad twice a year for my resident visa and stay miles away from him for a couple of months but he never failed to write me every single day, he would tell me what happened that day and how much he misses me. and what i’d do?.. ignore it. but  in fairness i write  once in two weeks (no e-mails yet at that time).

we were the typical young couple who could be seen inseparable at that time. i’ve grown to love him because he takes care of me in place of what my family should be providing me, he’s there  every single day and helps me with my projects. but still, my priority is still my studies. our relationship never affected my studies and the more we fight, the more i study hard.

our world turned upside down when he graduated and started working, i was still in college coz mine is a six-year course. i’m concentrating hard with my studies to graduate on time while he, discovered the outside world apart from me.. the corporate world. our relationship became taken for granted and there were so many fights, cool offs, other relationships, but we would still end up together. we hanged on like that for seven years.

but hey, i married that guy! i still had second thoughts of if i’m sure i like to adopt his surname coz sometimes i still use my maiden name especially when people became suddenly deaf of listening to my new surname. but whenever i look at him, he gives me the strength for this marriage to last, he would always pray for our marriage and he would always pray for us to stay in love as we are married for 11 years now. he always thank God that i came to his life and i do just the same.

and so, if i had seconds thoughts of adopting his surname before i marry him, now i know for sure i don’t have second thoughts that i married the right guy.

as i look back from all the things i’ve been doing this year, i realized i was completely a different person from what i was a few years back. year 2006 was a blast, really! i think this year is unforgettable for me. i’ve been going to places where i’ve never been to or went to the old places i dream of going to again. my airline mileage has been earning points this year because of frequent trips local and international. so frequent that i realized that i’m always out of manila every month. there was a time that i flew again after 2 weeks only. best part of it… the pictures, the memories, the experience, the fun and bonding with my family.
this year is also when i get to see the roots of my being, my parents. and my sis after so many years i’ve been longing to see them and be with them  again.  it was a dream come true and nothing in this world could make me trade off this wonderful time with them.
i was taken a back as i examine myself, i realized that i was totally different than before. i became stronger, independent and fun loving. i strived hard to deal with my patience. surprisingly, i now like to spend time alone with myself.( few years back, i’m not without a companion in shopping or in dining out coz i can’t go alone). but of course i still love going out with friends because there’s still that outgoing part of me. 
i just never outgrown being emotional, a drama queen. i also never outgrown being lost, i don’t have a sense of direction but i’m trying harder ok. then i thought, maybe that’ll be in my list of new year’s resolution…
happy new year to all!

once again, ’tis the season to be merry and generous. exchanging gifts, reuniting with the loveones, feasting and people start to line up in buffet tables at christmas parties as if diet is not a question at this time. well, i must say that we can still indulge. i have read that it’s ok to gain a little of 3 pounds for the holiday but no more than that in order to burn it faster and easier during a workout. sad to say, there’s a lot of parties to attend and weddings are ”in”, too so in my case, i should be religiously and faithfully working out in the gym to burn out all what i enjoyed eating this season. makes sense huh….
but of course, let’s not forget the main reason for this season. it’s not about gift giving, reunions and parties, it’s about the promise fulfilled by God to give us a savior - it’s Jesus Christ. so wherever you are, whatever  you do on christmas day, don’t forget to thank God for fulfilling His promise to us and that’s what i call a celebration! that’s what i call christmas… happy birthday Jesus!